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Suicide Prevention
If you or someone you know has ongoing
thoughts of death or suicide or if a suicide attempt has been made,
contact a doctor go to a hospital emergency room immediately or call
1-800-273-8255.
If you or someone you know suffers from
depression or manic depression (also known as bipolar disorder), you
understand all too well its symptoms may include feelings of sadness and
hopelessness. These feelings can also include thoughts of self-harm or
suicide. Whether we have suicidal thoughts ourselves or know a severely
depressed person who does, there are ways that we can respond with
strength and courage.
Understanding
Suicidal Thinking
The most important thing to remember about suicidal thoughts is that
they are symptoms of a treatable illness associated with fluctuations in
the chemistry of the body and brain. They are not signs of personal
weakness or character flaws, nor are they conditions that will just
"go away" by themselves. Depression and the depressive phase
of bipolar disorder may cause symptoms such as intense sadness,
hopelessness, lethargy, loss of appetite, disruption of sleep, decreased
ability to perform ones usual tasks, loss of interest in
once-pleasurable activities. Taken together, these symptoms may lead
someone to consider suicide. However, with proper treatment the majority
of people do feel better.
During severe depression, the systems
that regulate emotion become disturbed. People in severe depression
often think of things that are dark and sad. Physicians refer to this as
selective memory—only remembering the "bad times" or the
disappointments in life. This is a symptom of their illness, not who
they are, and with proper treatment the person will start to remember
good times and develop a more positive outlook. (top)
If
You Are Feeling Suicidal
If you have begun to think of suicide, it is important to recognize
these thoughts for what they are: expressions of a treatable medical
illness. Don't let embarrassment stand in the way of vital communication
with your physician, family or friends. Take immediate action and talk
to somebody today. Remember, suicide is a permanent solution to a
temporary problem.
When people don't understand the facts
about suicide and depressive illnesses, they may respond in ways that
can cut off communication and worsen feelings. That's why it is
important to find someone you trust and can talk with honestly. It's
also why your mental health professional is an important resource in
helping you, and your family. (top)
Some
facts about treatment
There are many different medications and therapies available for the
successful treatment of depression. Not all medications work the same on
all people, so it may take time for you and your doctor to develop a
treatment plan that’s right for you. Stick with it, and recognize that
your doctor is your partner in this search. (top)
Create a Plan for Life
Many depression-related suicides occur during the first three depressive
episodes before a person learns that an episode of suicidal thinking is
temporary. As people learn from experience that any given episode will
eventually pass, the likelihood that they will actually act on suicidal
impulses drops sharply. It is important to have a course of action ready
before thoughts of suicide occur. Some people find it helpful to develop
a Plan for Life. The Plan for Life lists warning signs you should watch
for and actions to take if you feel that you are slipping into suicidal
thoughts. Your Plan for Life may include:
- Contact information for your doctor,
including back-up phone numbers (emergency services, pager and
mobile phone)
- Contact information for friends and
family.
- A description of medical diagnosis,
not just your depression but any medical problems you may have.
Include information about any medications you are taking.
- Health insurance information
- Contact information for a local
suicide hotline
- Contact information for your local
DBSA support group.
Sample
Plan for Life
Educate those you trust about your
condition before it becomes a crisis so they can be prepared if they are
called upon to help. Provide key support people with your Plan for Life
so they can act quickly, if needed. Carry a copy of your Plan for Life
with you at all times so you can refer to it or pass it along to someone
else who might be helping you in a time of crisis. With all the phone
numbers in one place, it will be easier for someone to help. (top)
What
you can do to fight suicidal thoughts
- Keep a journal to write down your
thoughts. Each day, write about your hopes for the future and the
people you value in your life. Read what you've written when you
need to remind yourself why your own life is important.
- Go out with friends and family. When
we are well, we enjoy spending time with friends and family. When
we’re depressed, it becomes more difficult, but it is still
important. Visiting or allowing visits by family and friends who are
caring and can understand may help you feel better
- Avoid drugs and alcohol. Most deaths
by suicide result from sudden, uncontrolled impulses. Since drugs
and alcohol contribute to such impulses, it is essential to avoid
them. Drugs and alcohol also interfere with the effectiveness of
medications prescribed for depression.
- Learn to recognize the earliest
warning signs of a suicidal episode. There are often subtle warning
signs your body will give you when an episode is developing. As you
learn to manage your illness, you will learn how to be sensitive to
them. This is a signal to treat yourself with the utmost care, as
opposed to becoming angry or disgusted with yourself.
- Talk about suicide. Your ability to
explore the feelings, thoughts, and reactions associated with
depression can provide valuable perspective and reassurance to your
friend or loved one who may be depressed. Talking about suicide does
not plant the idea in someone’s head. Not everyone who thinks of
suicide attempts it. For many, it's a passing thought that lessens
over time. For a significant number of people, however, the
hopelessness and exaggerated anxiety brought on by untreated or
under-treated depression may create suicidal thoughts that they
cannot easily manage on their own. For this reason, take any mention
of suicide seriously.
If someone you know is very close to
suicide, direct questions about how, when, and where he or she intends
to commit suicide can provide valuable information that may help prevent
the attempt. Do not promise confidentiality in these circumstances. It
is important for you to share this information with the person’s
doctor. (top)
Recognizing
Warning Signs in Others
Sometimes even health care professionals have difficulty determining how
close a person may be to attempting suicide. As a friend or family
member, you can't know for certain either. If you sense there is a
problem, ask the person direct questions and point out behavior patterns
that concern you. Remind the person that you care about them and are
concerned. Talking about suicide with someone will not plant the idea in
his or her head. If necessary, suggest that they make appointment to see
their doctor and offer to go with them if you sense they would have
difficulty doing it on their own. If you believe that immediate
self-harm is possible, take the person to a doctor or hospital emergency
room immediately.
- Feelings of despair and
hopelessness
Often times, people with depression
talk about extreme, feelings of hopelessness, despair and self-doubt
with those closest to them. The more extreme these feelings grow, and
the more often they are described as "unbearable," the more
likely it is that the idea of suicide may enter the person's mind.
When a person is "winding up his
or her affairs" and making preparations for the family's welfare
after he or she is gone, it is a good chance they are considering
self-harm or suicide.
Rehearsing suicide, or seriously
discussing specific suicide methods, are also indications of a
commitment to follow through. Even if the person's suicidal intention
seems to come and go, such preparation makes it that much easier for
the individual to give way to a momentary impulse.
A person with worsening depression may
abuse drugs or alcohol. These substances can worsen symptoms of
depression or mania, decrease the effectiveness of medication, enhance
impulsive behavior, and severely cloud judgment.
It may sound strange, but a person with
depression may be most likely to attempt suicide just when he or she
seems to have passed an episode's low point and be on the way to
recovery.
Experts believe there is an association
between early recovery and increased likelihood of suicide. As
depression begins to lift, a person's energy and planning capabilities
may return before the suicidal thoughts disappear, enhancing the
chances of an attempt. Studies show that the period six to twelve
months after hospitalization is when patients are most likely to
consider or reconsider suicide. (top)
What
You Can Do to Help Someone
Among the many things you can do to help a depressed person who may be
considering suicide, most involve simply talking and listening. Do not
take on the role of therapist. Often times we just want someone to
listen. Though this may be difficult, here are some approaches that have
worked for others:
- Express empathy and concern
Severe depression is usually
accompanied by a self-absorbed, uncommunicative, withdrawn state of
mind. When you try to help, you may be met by an individual's
reluctance to discuss what he or she is feeling. At such times, it is
important to acknowledge the reality of the pain and hopelessness he
or she is experiencing. Resist the urge to function as a therapist,
which can ultimately create more feelings of rejection for the person,
who doesn't want to be "told what to do." Remain a
supportive friend and encourage continued treatment.
- Describe specific behaviors and
events that trouble you.
If you can explain particular ways a
persons’ behavior has changed, this may help to get communication
started. Try to help him or her overcome feelings of guilt.
Compounding the lack of interest in communication may be guilt or
shame over having suicidal thoughts. If there has already been a
suicide attempt, guilt over both the attempt and its failure can make
the problem worse. It is important to reassure the individual that
there is nothing shameful about what they are thinking and feeling.
Keep stressing that thoughts of hopelessness, guilt, and even suicide
are all symptoms of a treatable medical condition and reinforce the
person’s good work in keeping with their treatment plan.
Never promise confidentiality if you
believe someone is very close to suicide. Keep the person’s doctor
or therapist informed of any thoughts of suicide. If possible it is
best to encourage the person to discuss it with doctors themselves,
but you should be ready to confirm that those discussions have taken
place. This may involve making an appointment to visit the doctor
together or calling the doctor on your own. Be aware that a doctor
will not be able to discuss the person’s condition with you. You
should only call to inform the doctor of your concern.
Whenever possible you should get
permission from the depressed person to call their doctor if you feel
there is a problem. Otherwise it could be seen as "butting
in" and may worsen their symptoms or cause added stress. Of
course, if you believe there is a serious risk of immediate self-harm,
call their doctor. You can work out any feelings of anger the person
has towards you later.
- Stress that the person's life is
important to you and to others.
Many people find it awkward to put into
words how another person's life is important for their own well-being.
Emphasize in specific terms the ways in which the person's suicide
would be devastating to you and others. Share personal stories or
pictures of past events.
The person may express anger and feel
betrayal by your attempt to prevent their suicide or get them into
treatment. Be strong. Realize that these reactions are caused by the
illness and should pass once the person has received the proper
treatment.
A person who has thought about or
attempted suicide will most likely have feelings of guilt and shame.
Be supportive and assure the person that their actions were caused by
an illness that can be treated. Offer your continued support to help
them recover.
It is not uncommon for friends and
family members to experience stress or symptoms of depression when
dealing with a suicidal person. You can only help the person through
their own treatment with encouragement and support. You cannot get
better for them. Do not focus all of your energy on the one person,
ask friends and family to join you in providing support and keep to
your normal routine as much as possible. Pay attention to your own
feelings and seek help if you need it. (top)
Responding
to an Emergency Situation
If someone is threatening to commit suicide; if someone has let you know
they are close to acting on a suicidal impulse, or if you strongly
believe he or she is close to a suicidal act, these steps can help you
manage the crisis.
- Take the person seriously. Stay calm,
but don't under-react.
- Involve other people. Don't try to
handle the crisis alone or jeopardize your own health or safety.
Call 911, if necessary. Contact the person's doctor, the police, a
crisis intervention team, or others who are trained to help.
- Express concern. Give concrete
examples of what leads you to believe the person is close to
suicide.
- Listen attentively. Maintain eye
contact. Use body language such as moving close to the person or
holding his or her hand, if appropriate.
- Ask direct questions. Find out if the
person has a specific plan for suicide. Determine, if you can, what
method of suicide is being considered.
- Acknowledge the person's feelings. Be
understanding, not judgmental or argumentative. Do not relieve the
person of responsibility for his or her actions.
- Offer reassurance. Stress that suicide
is a permanent solution to a temporary problem, reminding the person
that there is help and things will get better.
- Don't promise confidentiality. You may
need to speak to the person's doctor in order to protect the person
from him or herself.
- Make sure guns and old medications are
not available.
- If possible, don't leave the person
alone until you are sure they are in the hands of competent
professionals. If you have to leave, make sure another friend or
family member can stay with the person until they can receive help.
DBSA
Support Groups Can Help
With a grassroots network of over 1000 chapters and support groups
across the country, no one with depression has to feel alone. While DBSA
groups do not offer suicide crisis programs, they do provide a caring
environment for people to come together to discuss their challenges and
successes in living with depression. They are not group therapy, though
many groups have a professional advisor and all groups have
appointed facilitators. DBSA groups provide a forum for mutual
understanding and self-discover, help people stay compliant with their
treatment plans and gain support from others who have "been
there." For information on a DBSA support group in your area,
contact DBSA at (800) 826-3632 or see our support
group locator.
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